Smart Pekingese, Clever Butterflies And Contented People

When little nine and a half year old Alex brought home his report card, Mom said "how come you got several B’s instead of the usual all A’s?"  He said "many others did not get that many B’s. They got C’s., so I am doing well." This is illustrative of how many people feel about their ballroom dancing skills. They figure that they see so many others hardly doing the height of their level, so they are doing great. However, trying to attain a higher level is an even grander achievement. 

There is a couple dancing when we are at the dance on Sundays (when our feet and shoulders were not injured as we had happened to us way back in December) and their names are Paula and Martin. Paula and Martin think they are very good dancers and they get up and dance their style and they contemplate that they are wonderful dancers. However, the only training they have had is going to about six yearly dance camp vacations. There, they spend the weekend and learn in a group atmosphere. They watch a lot and try to imitate what they see and feel that they have extra special training moments. They have taught their minds to feel good about themselves and then they come back and dance for all to see their achievements. They feel in their hearts that they are excellent at what they do and C’s are O.K., because so many others are not (in their opinion) doing as well as they are.

This is a good attitude in a sense, because at least they are dancing; they are not promoting thoughts in their minds that they are inadequate. They feel elated in what they have accomplished and so they enjoy their dancing hobby more than folks who do not feel that competent. Paula and Martin are really not that competent in what they do, but they see themselves better than what they really are. This can be a positive thing, because at least they are accomplishing having fun and feeling good about dancing. This is a better feeling than many others that I know who sit many dances out because they think themselves under dance educated. A good idea is to shift your energy to a higher purpose and imagine yourself doing your thing in a higher level. Your mind eventually perceives this as attaining this goal and the more you practice this thought process in your mind, the more you will feel better about yourself. This leads to the confidence of Paula and Martin and encourages your feet and mind to get out there and do whatever you do. Even if your level is not as adequate as others, you have had at least the motion, the movement, the courage and the emotion to continue you’re dancing. You feel marvelous about yourself and you need not fill your mind with negative thoughts. Dancing becomes your friend and your friend gives you pleasure.

I know a woman who is about eighty-three years of age and though she does not dance anymore (they gave it up about ten years ago) she thinks that whatever she does is the greatest. She thinks herself better than her neighbors in the court she lives on. She thinks she is better looking, that her house is prettier on the inside and the outside that her flowers along the walkway are more colorful, that she is the only one in the neighborhood who cooks from scratch and therefore she is the most special person she knows. Technically, she is none of the above, she is very homely, her cooking is just fair and there are many houses on the block that are more attractive than hers and her flowers are not very colorful. I admire her "chutzpah" (guts and gall) in her beliefs, because her convictions are solid gold in her mind and she works from that attitude in making her life very happy and content. 

Charles Darwin said “The most complete of all distinctions between man and the lower animals is belief.” Our little Pekingese named Rhumba was able in her young years to hop up on the sofa in the family room or on one of my son’s twin beds. As she aged, it took longer and finally in her eleventh year, she could not do that. She knowing she could not would sit at the space between the bed and the downstairs’ sofa and let you know that now she needed help to get to her destination. She was smart enough to signal us, this is what she desired, by sitting on the floor at the spot she wanted to be lifted up from. Once up, she was able to jump down on her own and repeated the desire when she wanted to go up again by sitting by the object she wanted to be on. Even though she knew she could no longer attain that position, her belief was somehow in her little mind. Contrary to what Darwin said, Rhumba believed in her human family to accomplish her happiness.

Being content at this point in our lives is a very special thing and I admire contented people. People who are happy in their own skin and people who present themselves to others as happy people are nice to see. We look at them and wonder sometimes where they get their chutzpah from. They get it from their sheer moments of inner peace and even though this peace originates from small pieces of special doings or moments or small accomplishments, they are happy and fulfilled and that is what it is all about in this moment of our lives, whether we be seniors, not yet seniors or younger folks. It is good to strive for higher accomplishments, but if we cannot attain them, then B’s equal A’s and as young Alex said many others did not even get B’s like I did, they got C’s. Alex has a point there because he at nine years of age was content with his B’s and rightly so. Our energy should be directed to trying to attain higher heights, but if we cannot reach those heights, than the height we have climbed is pretty darn good.

Shakespeare said in Sonnet 18 “Shall I compare thee to a summer’s day?” We can compare our lives to others’ lives and think the other person is living a more productive, rich, healthier and happier life. We do not know what is going on inside their body or their home. We most likely have the summer day right here in our snowy wintertime; and may not realize it. Paula and Martin in their way realize what they have or think they have and that gives them the summer’s day regardless of the weather.

Try to strive for higher heights only if you can reach them; do not give up, if you cannot grab them. Trying to touch them is a plus for you. Whatever, you gain; it will be a bright summer day even in January.There is an ancient proverb “ Just when the caterpillar thought the world was over,it became a butterfly.”You can too.