Nancy, Her Sight Of Her Love Of Life

I had a blind aunt and a blind uncle. They were the fifth and sixth children of my mom’s mom and dad. Her name was Rose and she changed it to Ruth and his name was Joseph and he changed it to George.

They were marvelous human beings, each graduated from a regular high school and both never used a cane. They had great careers and married sighted people and I have written about them in former articles. All the nieces and nephews loved them so much and our lives were enriched from having them in our family. They are both gone now almost thirty years. I miss them a lot.

When we go to a diner to eat here in Baltimore, there is a blind lady and she reminds me of my Aunt Ruth. Even the tones of her voice sound like a younger version of Ruth. She comes on a bus/car run by the county which brings people who need rides even for restaurants on a weekend. They come back for her about an hour later. She use to come with her Seeing Eye dog but the dear, sweet dog passed away and she was not the recipient of another one. She sits and eats and enjoys her food and lots of folks say hi to her. She and the waiter, a young Greek fellow have a great rapport. He calls her by her name and he gets the food she wants the way she desires it. He comes by to check on her often and she tells him she wants a few cookies to take home. They have these huge cookies with jimmies on them and that is what she requests.

I presume she lives alone now that the dog is gone. She dresses nicely, all coordinated and her hair is cut short, gray and neatly done. I noticed tonight her fingernails are painted a pretty color of pink. When someone says how are you, she replies “fine.” Fine, she is and her voice has a lilt to it like my Aunt Ruth.

Aunt Ruth became a singer and sang on some radio shows and entertained at some events. That is where she met her husband, a sighted fellow who fell in love with her when he came to one of these events. They courted, married in New York City and came to Baltimore where my mom, her older sister had a reception for her and for Uncle Larry to meet us all-his new family. She knitted her complete wardrobe and learned to put makeup on and she even learned to become a gourmet cook.

This lady reminds me so of Aunt Ruth, I want to go up and tell her all this, I hesitate for interfering in a stranger’s life. I watched her tonight, I was able to see her in the mirrored strip of mirror near the seats we sat at right in front of her. I could not see her from the front because my husband blocked my view; but in the mirror, I saw her eat neatly, with great love for the food and she reached for side dishes and placed them in front of her very meticulously. It looked almost as if she could see. She uses a long white cane and when she is finished, she has the waiter get her money out of the wallet inside her huge purse. He tells her how much the check is and she tells him which bills to take out and some for his tip. Then he takes her arm, she her cane and he or the manager escorts her to the front of restaurant and she waits patiently for the ride to take her home.

She is amazing with her sweet personality and I do not know what she has done for a living. She seems retired. Every time we see her, she is dressed nicely, groomed well and full of a special charm. She does not seem to be in a mode of being sorry for her fate; she seems tuned in to the good things in her current life and she appears happy to be there among the crowds, the friendly manager and the handsome waiter who brings her whatever she wants.

The reason for this story is that seeing someone like her with a terrible handicap and here she has turned it around and appears to enjoy life as it was dealt to her. She comes there often, maybe twice a week and she seems to enjoy being with the friendly staff and everyone likes her. I like her, though I have not really spoken with her. One day, I shall and I will tell her that she reminds me of Aunt Ruth and Uncle George who enjoyed life too and dealt with what they had to accomplish with being blind. She likes when someone talks to her and always speaks to them as if life is really perfect. It is a difficult life, but people like her, my aunt and uncle and many other folks who are blind adjust to their lives because they have no other choice.

One day and I think some of it may have been accomplished already in small amounts; perhaps there will be eye transplants and they will be donated from someone who passed on. People like my restaurant lady will benefit from being able to now see. I mentioned in a former article that Uncle George in about 1948 was given the chance to try something new being used by a female doctor named Dr. Mary Small. She was going to insert the new invention called contact lenses and they were made in Japan and we had just been at war with them. He refused saying he could not use something made by people in Japan. He chose to remain totally blind when these contact lenses could have helped him to see at least large print and other objects. This was his choice and he stated that to his siblings, of which one was my mom.

We could not understand as children who were his nieces and nephews why he chose that. This was his preference and no one tried to talk him out of it. He was satisfied with his then life and he worked and had a wife, played the piano with a combo group and wanted things to stay as they were. This was his life and he was happy with it.

To not see has to be one of the worse afflictions one can have. Blind folks accomplish so much now and are productive citizens in our communities all over this country. People like George, Ruth and this lady in the restaurant show us sighted people that life goes on, they continue on and they are content with what they have been given and you could say not been given.

It teaches us to be always thankful, satisfied, happy and content with what we have, physically, mentally and even when we yearn for things not in our immediate future; we are still so blessed. The huge lottery was just won with a winning ticket sold not far from where I live, perhaps five miles in a Seven Eleven store. Also, the 250,000 one was sold right out in this area where Cockeysville Patch reaches.

Everyone was conjecturing all week what they would do with all that money. Some said buy a new house; quit my job, travel, fancy new cars, and money aside for children and grandchildren’s college educations. Everyone dreamed of being the winner and how life would become, one long and glorious vacation taking vacations.

So now there are three winning tickets and even if the three who held the tickets split it with others when they bought them as a group, there is lots of money and everyone feels lots of happiness in store for them. A friend of mine knew a person who twenty years ago won ten million which was considered so much money to win back then. She quit her job, bought a house for her sister, one for herself and even spent ten thousand dollars for a fancy front entrance door. She bought a home out of town for her only child, a daughter. Once, we saw her in a local store and checking the prices of toothpaste etc. We thought, wow, she is still checking prices! The one thing she always wanted was out of her reach even with ten million dollars. She yearned to be a grandparent. That did not happen.

Our dreams can be likely and happening even without winning the lottery. I once won four thousand dollars in a synagogue drawing of tickets costing one hundred dollars each. The prize was touted as win a Cadillac because then in 1958, you could get a Cadillac for that. I had the winning ticket and it was shared with my employer. We each got 2000 dollars and less taxes, it was 1500 dollars. I bought mom and dad a new magnificent dining room set of a huge table, six upholstered chairs, and a breakfront to hold china in and another piece of furniture called a buffet table.

Mom and dad had the old set for over thirty years and it was time to modernize the room and I did it for them. I was a good  child, a fine and generous young woman and it made me so happy to see the light in mom’s eyes every week when she dusted the beautiful wood of the table, chairs and breakfront cabinet. That was worth me giving up my own money, because I was a winner when I got them for my parents.

Seeing is believing is an old slogan. It can be used here. Seeing the restaurant woman, we shall call her Nancy and her reaction to her life, surroundings and happy disposition is a joy and from it we can all learn a daily lesson. That is that we are blessed every day, that we have the necessary things and surely to be able to see is one of the most blessed ones.

Let us all in this coming season of Easter and Passover which are side by side in 2012 on the same days, count our blessings, good fortune and benefits and be content even though we did not win the lottery.

We did win the lottery because we are here and in good health and blessed with our sight. Nancy is not blind, she is seeing the world through her closed eyes and the world still looks wonderful to her because she, herself, is amazing, awesome, pleasant, happy and hopefully healthy.

She has her own special vision on life and so should we, because we can truly see and I perceive that she possesses it too, she has the sight of her love of life.